Jackson Fortney, Staff Writer
Born and raised in the Swiss Alps, Jackson prides himself in his exceptional skills on the slopes. His abilities are unmatched to those of his peers, and he is internationally renowned as the unrivaled champion of the world. When forced to suffer through a season without snow, Jackson spends his time laboring for the City of Wayzata. Many believe he is diligent in his work, yet he has been spotted aimlessly roaming the city streets on the back of his lawn mower. The remainder of Jackson’s life is quite unclear, though it is widely known that he spends a considerable amount of time keeping his hair on point. Many know of, yet few have seen, his infamous hair flip, able to draw the attention any woman within five-hundred feet.
