As a child, Parker Breza was deathly afraid of any food that was named after an animal. This however, did not apply to one of his favorites: bacon. Despite his contradictory eating habits, Parker went on to become a vegetarian, though he still ate seafood, something not normally consumed on such a diet. Through all the controversy, Parker has finally come to his senses by switching over to an all vegan diet, the ultimate pinnacle of pretentiousness. Apparently it’s easier to omit everything that might cause an issue rather than to simply keep track of the term you refer to yourself as. Parker can now be found hanging out at a local organic juice bar or protesting at barbecue joints.