Charlie Damberg, Staff Writer
Every morning, Charlie Damberg awakens and anxiously begins pwning Daoist vegans on Twitter via his pseudonymous accounts; this he considers his ultimate contribution to society. You may ask, how does he manage to accomplish this Herculean task? The answer to this (and many other reasonable questions about him) is a diet of raw eggs and coffee. Other than writing for the Knight Errant, he is the tyrannical autocrat of Student Council, a mediocre member of the JGA Flyers, aspiring mathematics guru, and based Hermetic. To the right, you will find a collection of articles under his name, most of which are contracted out to his skilled team of ghost-writers. However, if you can avoid the subtle anarcho-primitivist underpinnings of his publications, you’ll find a deeply coded message asking readers to save him from the latent underground masonic quasi-illuminati cult that meets every Friday at an undisclosed location on campus.
