Thanksgiving Needs To a Bigger Deal

Lucian Parece commercializes the world's most underrated Holiday.

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Thanksgiving Needs To a Bigger Deal

Lucian Parece, Staff Writer

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Thanksgiving brings delicious food, family time, and happiness to people across the country. We all love getting out of school, seeing friends and family, and gorging ourselves on turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing and pie. But Thanksgiving’s good cheer can often be overshadowed by the ads and decorations for Christmas that emerge mere days after Halloween.

Many Scrooge McDucks feel obliged to moan and groan every time they see Frosty the Snowman, Rudolph the Reindeer, or fat, bearded cartoon man wearing red prior to December first. This issue has (probably) been plaguing Americans since the invention of the television, and nobody has come up with a solution yet. Until now! I propose that the only fix to this problem is to commercialize Thanksgiving.

The first step to take is to write a few songs for this wonderful holiday. Christmas has entire radio station dedicated to its countless songs, while the only Thanksgiving songs I can think of are “Over the River and Through the Woods”, and Adam Sandler’s “Thanksgiving Song.” Now I am no songwriter, but let’s be honest, even some of the most classic Christmas songs aren’t really that creative. I have a few suggestions: “Roasty the Turkey,” “Your Weird Uncle is Coming to Town,” “Grandma Got Run Over by a Float at the Parade,” and “I Saw Daddy Eating the Pie Before Dinner.” And honestly, for Minnesotans, songs like “Winter Wonderland,” “Sleigh Ride,” and “Frosty the Snowman” can really apply to Thanksgiving also, because most years winter starts weeks before Thanksgiving.

Next, we need a few cute animated TV specials to pump us all up for Thanksgiving. These must include a few ingredients: a main character that is rejected by his peers for some reason, a journey for him to go on with a few funny sidekicks, a bad guy who will turn good, and a feel good message that is almost always “accept the people who are different”

Picture this: small, skinny Lurkey the Turkey who can’t run quite as fast as the others, or gobble gobble quite as loud as the others is always being picked on by the other turkeys. Feeling rejected, Lurkey decides to leave his home to find something new––perhaps himself! Along the way, he meets Corny the walking Cornucopia and Grim the walking Pilgrim doll. Finally, they encounter the dreaded Hunter, who all turkeys live in fear of. Lurkey, who has learned much on this journey, decides to face his fear and confront the Hunter. We discover that the Hunter is, in fact, a benevolent lover of turkeys, and would never hurt one. He gives Lurkey and his friends a ride in his pick-up back to Lurkey’s home, where he is now a living legend, and is not only accepted by his peers, but elected Turkey President.

Thanksgiving is such a great holiday, and such a great excuse to pig-out, that it saddens me to see it given so little credit. But, with these songs and TV specials, I believe Thanksgiving will be given the credit it deserves.

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