12 Ways to Procrastinate for Finals

Do you really want to fill out that seventeen-page Spanish study guide and then spend hours with your nose in a binder trying to figure out what you were supposed to be learning in APUSH? Neither do I. In fact, studies have shown that procrastination works, and believe me those studies were put off until the last minute and look how accurate the results are!

1. Trivia Crack.


You’re learning so much about history, science, art, and geography on your iPhone that it’s almost like looking at a study guide.

2. Netflix.

ezgif.com-resize (1)

Orange is the New Black or the Black Plague? I choose the prison wives.

3. Staring at walls.

ezgif.com-resize (3)

Keep an eye out for suspicious activity by starting a neighborhood watch program alone in your bedroom; you never can be too sure that your wall isn’t a Transformer.

4. Staring at books.

ezgif.com-resize (4)

Books love staring contests as much as your English teacher likes assigning homework on snow days. But don’t even bother reading it. Soon enough you’ll develop a photographic memory and studying will be irrelevant.

5. Don’t.

ezgif.com-resize (5)

Just don’t study.

6: Food.

ezgif.com-resize (6)

Eat your feelings. Eat them all. If this isn’t a  productive way of studying, then I don’t know what is.

7. The Sue Fairy.

ezgif.com-resize (7)

Put a study guide under your pillow, and the Sue Fairy will come and cancel school the next day.

8. Naps.

ezgif.com-resize (8)

When you leave school on one of the Finals half days, go to bed immediately. Getting a good night sleep has been proven to increase performance level on finals, so you don’t even need to study. Just get 19 hours of sleep and you’re set for that 500 question math final.

9. YouTube.

ezgif.com-resize (9)

It’s up to us, America, to financially support the talented cats of YouTube by watching the videos of them falling, dancing, and playing instruments. This is exactly the kind of felinethropy BSM encourages in its students

10. A “Study Session” with “Friends.”

ezgif.com-resize (10)

I’ve heard that this is a procrastination technique that people use to pretend to be productive, but really just gossip with friends at a coffee house. I don’t understand this concept of “friends,” so I have no further advice.

11. Social media.

ezgif.com-resize (11)

Why study from your books when you could Instagram a picture of them or rant about them on Twitter? If you get really desperate, make a vine or hit up Myspace.

12. Write a Knight Errant article

ezgif.com-resize (13)

It worked for me.