Why is it that in freshman year people become so serious with their first actual “loves” or crushes? Once when I was a freshman, I touched the hand of my crush and immediately affiliated it with the “touch of a relationship.”

Let me just say that when I like a boy, I really like that boy–– it gets to the point when I get almost everyone involved. I would secretly talk to his friends and find out what bands he likes and then whenever he was around I would say that I like that band. He would look at me and say, “you like them too? I didn’t think anyone else did.” I wanted it to seem like we were “meant for each other,” which ultimately attracted his attention towards me.

Have you ever noticed that underclassmen always have that dumb-founded look on their faces when they’re talking to their crushes? It’s kind of disgusting–some people start sweating, faces turn beet red because they want to make sure they aren’t saying anything that might make them look dumb, and girls twirl their hair with their fingers. You can just tell who likes whom by the way underclassmen talk to each other.

Once, freshman year, I was persuaded into playing a game of “partner hide and seek” after school in the theater. The lights were always off so it always made the game a little more intense and a little more interesting every time.

In the midst of playing the game, the guys thought it best to give me and this guy some smooching time. During the smooching, someone just happened to be sitting on the piano bench and accidentally leaned on the piano keys creating a big bang. I couldn’t help it, so I laughed and that was the end of that “romantic” (if you want to call it that) moment.

The next day at school, walking through the freshman hallway this guy and I made eye contact, and it was that awkward eye contact but at the same time the “secret connection between you two “eye contact. It didn’t take even a week for everyone to know that I liked this guy because like I said earlier, I got everyone involved. You know how freshmen are–loud mouths. Nothing stays a secret, especially when you like someone freshmen make it a priority to shout it out loud and tell it to that person.

Sophomore year I was no better. I liked a guy (we’re going to call him Tom) and once again I got everyone involved. I started talking to his friends (more like stalking his friends) and finally got them to give me his number after practically begging them for it. One day when I was venting to my friend about Tom over a text, I said things like, “this whole situation with Tom is so confusing, I don’t know what to do with him.” After not hearing a response back from her for a couple of minutes, I re-checked my “sent messages” to find I had accidentally texted this to Tom.

Hyper-ventilating, sweating, and pacing from the idiotic mistake I had made, I came up with probably the worst lie ever to have been said in the history of man. I flipped open my phone and began texting; “oops, sorry wrong Tom. I have another friend named Tom and your guys’ names are right next to each other and I just found out he’s going to jail so I’m just so confused about this situation and I don’t know what to do.”

To this day I am still convinced that Tom believed my little lie, but then again I don’t know who would actually think that’s true. Shoot.