Knight Errant

Trauma on the playground

Trauma on the playground

Ricky Floyd, Staff Writer

March 31, 2017


Filed under DIVERSIONS, TOP STORIES

It was a hot and sunny day. I was in preschool and, as obnoxious as I was, I was not prepared for what was going to happen that day nor did I know that all the clout I had built up was going to be diminished in .2 seconds. I had two best friends—Zach, my best guy friend and Mercedes, who was my...

When life gives you rats

When life gives you rats

Anna Bergsland, Staff Writer

March 30, 2017


Filed under DIVERSIONS, TOP STORIES

‘Twas three nights before Christmas, when all through the house, not a creature was stirring… except for two baby rats. This past winter, I had the best/worst Christmas anyone I've ever had. I have spent the past year growing my love for rats, referring to almost everyone good and bad as “rats,”...

Where to park in the BSM parking lot

Where to park in the BSM parking lot

Riley O'Connor, Staff Writer

March 29, 2017


Filed under DIVERSIONS, TOP STORIES

The BSM parking lot holds years of history within it, dating back to when Ms. Shea roamed the halls as a student, and even farther back than that—if that's possible. This lot is handed down to each senior class at the end of the year and remains to be one of the most complex areas of the school we ...

The indefinite ranking of the BSM hallways

The indefinite ranking of the BSM hallways

Mary Youngblut, Staff Writer

March 9, 2017


Filed under DIVERSIONS, TOP STORIES

Main Hallway: Poor The Main Hallway is a crowded mess. It has access points to all the major locations throughout the school, but is it worth the pushing and shoving? Don’t get me started on the groups of people who stand around a friend's locker oblivious to the fact that they are blocking traff...

Working at Chuck E. Cheese was a vomit-filled nightmare

Working at Chuck E. Cheese was a vomit-filled nightmare

Olivia Rossman, Staff Writer

February 23, 2017


Filed under DIVERSIONS, TOP STORIES

“Hey, Olivia, so I just wanna let you know, the guy at your party… it looks like he has a gun, so I’m not going to be in the Chuck E. costume,” my former coworker, Alex, told me one September day. I had been working at Chuck E. Cheese Inc. for three months at that point, and there were rarely en...

How splitting a piece of gum ruined our lives

How splitting a piece of gum ruined our lives

Nathanael Ashton-Piper and Claudia Elsenbast

February 10, 2017


Filed under DIVERSIONS, TOP STORIES

It started third hour World Religions with Mr. Loecken. Earlier that day, Claudia had consumed an Everything Bagel from Bruegger's Bagels for breakfast, and I consumed an orange juice from Taher. We breathed noxious air, and we both knew it. In our time of need, we turned to our fellow classmates, see...

How Andrew Torrance lost $200 through stocks

How Andrew Torrance lost $200 through stocks

Andrew Torrance, Staff Writer

February 3, 2017


Filed under DIVERSIONS, TOP STORIES

'Twas the summer of 2015, I was overly ambitious, a tad cocky, and I had just figured out how to buy stocks. Notice how I didn’t say, “I had acquired the knowledge necessary to successfully manage a diversified stock portfolio.” All I knew was how to buy a stock. Next, I sat down, thought about...

Carolina’s Towing Troubles

Carolina’s Towing Troubles

Carolina Jimenez, Magazine Editor-In-Chief

January 29, 2017


Filed under DIVERSIONS, TOP STORIES

Have you ever wanted to spend your Tuesday night at the Minneapolis DMV? Have you ever wanted to stand in a line for three hours so that you can pay $138  to get your car back? Have you ever wanted to do that twice? Of course you haven’t. Getting your car towed sends you to a nightmare hellscape where...

Lost and found: my relationship with Netflix

Lost and found: my relationship with Netflix

Andrew Torrance, Staff Writer

January 26, 2017


Filed under DIVERSIONS, TOP STORIES

There I was, minding my own business on Christmas break, logging into Netflix to watch my shows that I desperately needed to get caught up on. As I clicked on an episode, the excitement of being reunited with Netflix filled my soul. As exhilarated as I was, that was all shot down like a rebel pilot du...

Intramural Basketball Pre-Season Preview

Intramural Basketball Pre-Season Preview

Owen Brown, Staff Writer

January 5, 2017


Filed under DIVERSIONS, TOP STORIES

Breakin’ Ankles Shatterin’ Dreams: Starting off the rankings, we have the defending IBA champions. Consisting of all former JV BSM basketball players, this team has extreme depth and some of the most polarizing players in the league. Eric Wilson, the league’s most dominant rebounder, is...

Inside Dr. Love

Inside Dr. Love

Claudia Elsenbast, Dr. Love

December 19, 2016


Filed under DIVERSIONS, Dr. Love, TOP STORIES

Behind the glitz and glamor of being a doctor with no degree lies the real Dr. Love. I, Claudia Elsenbast, am about to give you an inside peak into the secret life of Dr. Love. It’s not easy being held to such a high standard, but somehow I make do. Since day one as the Diversions Editor I knew th...

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