Jessica Nolan, staff writer
Jessica Nolan grew up on a small exotic island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean where her only friend was a small penguin named Puffle. Unfortunately, she was forced to move away from the small island when a ship of pirates kidnapped her and brought her to Minnesota. There she founded her love of watching crime shows, and because of the unhealthy addiction she claims her real name is Horatio Cane and that she lives in Miami. Her hobbies include slowly taking off sunglasses and staring into the distance, watching herself on CSI Miami, and saying awesome one liners like “no need now, the verdict is in” then putting on her sunglasses.
