Religion teacher to enter seminary at University of Notre Dame

June 6, 2013

Mary Pat Ross, Staff Writer

After much thought and consideration, religion teacher Joe Pedersen has announced his decision to enter the seminary. Pedersen will depart for Notre Dame Seminary next fall. Entering the seminary is not something Pedersen has always planned on doing. “During college I was introduced to a lot of great priests, and they showed me how good and happy that life can be. I have been thinking about it since then, but through my prayer and discernment I have come to believe that I need to explore that possibility now,” Pedersen said. As of right now, he has not made a definite decision to enter the priesthood. Pedersen hopes to discern God’s plan for him. “I wouldn’t go to the... Continue Reading

Five student athletes drafted by the United States Hockey League

Recent graduate TJ Moore is expected to play for the Waterloo Black Hawks in the upcoming season. (Carson Mark)

Five student athletes drafted by the United States Hockey League

June 6, 2013

Thomas Muenzberg, Staff Writer

Five Benilde-St. Margaret’s student athletes were drafted in the 2013 United States Hockey League draft. Sophomores Ben Newhouse and Chase Jungels, senior TJ Moore, as well as juniors Jack Jablonski and Spencer Naas were drafted throughout the two day draft. Ben Newhouse was drafted 72nd overall in the fifth round of the USHL draft by the Waterloo... Continue Reading

Amidst scandal, IRS needs to re-consider non-profit qualifications

June 4, 2013

Molly Eldvick, Staff Writer

This past May, the IRS came clean about their thorough scrutiny towards the Tea Party and affiliated conservative groups. Speculation surrounding this scandal has developed since prior to the 2012 election, raising suspicions as to who was to blame for the inquiries. However, in manipulating this IRS scandal into a conspiracy theory centered on President Obama we have lost focus of the true issue at hand: organizations unrelated to social welfare that are receiving tax-exempt status. Let me start by saying that it is the IRS’ responsibility to remain politically neutral; they did something illegal and must face due consequences. Their actions alone warrant public scrutiny, but the substance... Continue Reading

Senior pursues passion for making and producing music

June 6, 2013

Laura Lyon, Staff Writer

Senior Thomas Gorrilla's strong passion for music make him place a great importance on it in his life. Gorilla is involved in creating music in a workspace that he created himself. He used his closet to set up a “recording studio”, per say, in which he writes, raps, sings, and creates his own beats. Gorilla began his musical pursuit during his sophomore year, when he created a music video as a joke. After his friend commented on how impressive it turned out to be, he was inspired to begin playing around with GarageBand on his Mac computer, creating remixes of songs. “It’s a good way to get emotions out,” Gorilla said. Although Gorilla has a strong passion for music, he is a dedicated... Continue Reading

The best of the Twin Cities’ ice cream shops prepare for a delicious summer

Adele's unique and secret custard recipe sets them apart from traditional ice cream shops. (Grace Moran)

The best of the Twin Cities’ ice cream shops prepare for a delicious summer

June 6, 2013

Grace Moran, Staff Writer

Sebastian Joe’s Sebastian Joe’s, another of Minnesota’s nationally recognized best ice cream shops, can be found in the heart of Minneapolis and Uptown. Created by brothers Tim, Todd, and Michael in 1984, Sebastian Joe’s—named after their late grandfather Sebastiano or “Joe”— has been family owned since its origins and pushes for excellence... Continue Reading

SportDateTimeOpponentLocation
Click on any sport above to see a full schedule for that sport.
SportDateOpponentResultW/L
Boys GolfThu, May 30 Section Opponents5th Place
Boys LacrosseThu, May 30 Blake (Section)7-8 Read StoryL
BaseballThu, May 30 Armstrong (Sections)0-5L
Girls GolfWed, May 29 Section Opponents4th Place
Boys LacrosseTue, May 28 Washburn (Sections)17-3W
BaseballMon, May 27 Hopkins (Sections)0-4L
BaseballMon, May 27 Richfield (Sections)6-5W
Sat, May 25 Orono (Sections)7-6W
BaseballSat, May 25 Orono (Sections)7-6W
Boys LacrosseFri, May 24 Edina16-8 Read StoryW
SoftballFri, May 24 Armstrong (Sections)3-4L
SoftballThu, May 23 Edina (Sections)3-4L
Click on any sport above to see a full schedule for that sport.
Filed under Humor

Oil change

I had to get my oil changed, so I dropped off my car and I walked into the service station. I scanned the room for an open table. There it was, the only one. I walked over to it and started to work on my Spanish homework.

After about five minutes, a rather corpulent woman walked into the room, sat down, and pulled out her knitting. A couple of minutes later, I was startled by something that sounded similar to a werewolf with a hairball. I looked up, unaware that there was a full moon tonight, only to find that it was not a werewolf, but the corpulent woman. She had been clearing her throat––something she continued to do every thirty seconds.

All this time there is a woman who paces back and forth behind me until she finally grabs a chair, pulls it out, sits down and begins to interrogate me. She demanded answers to questions such as why I was here, accusing me of getting into an accident when the reality was that I only needed an oil change.

She then asked me how long I had been driving, and the conversation then turned to how old I was — the lady, assuming I was nineteen, was surprised to hear that I hadn’t even had my license for a year. After a momentary spaz attack she began showering me with compliments. “Oh, well I thought you were at least nineteen – you are the prettiest girl I have ever met – you’re just gorgeous,” she said.

Stunned by the all around awkwardness of this situation, I sat there in silence. The knitting werewolf cleared her throat quickly three times in rapid succession.

After that she proceeded to argue with a salesman about the price offered for her car. After five minutes of heated argument she finally settled for $500. Expecting her to leave I continued working on my homework, when suddenly she turned to me and began to complain about her unsatisfactory transaction.

“Those people are just so stingy, all they care about is their money. In fact I bought the car from these people — I knew this guy because I was dating his niece…anyway I just had to do it — I’m in a hurry to move to a different state,” she said. Then suddenly she shoved her chair back and started smelling her shirt. “I’m sorry, I smell really bad,” she said. Then she picked up her stuff and left.

Well I’m not exactly sure what to make of the encounter. I don’t know if she was hitting on me or just trying to find a new look so that the authorities can’t find her in her new life in her new state. The one thing that I learned is to never get your oil changed at night––you don’t know what lurks in the depths of the service station, whether it be werewolves or a crazy fugitive woman.

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